Anxiety: Where's the Off Button on this Thing?!
As I write, I am currently attempting to enjoy my two month winter break after my first quarter of my first year as a college student. Yes, two months and yes, attempting. After the wondrous wild ride of my first experience at college, taking a break feels like I am sinking in a perpetual pothole of stagnation.
I understand that I may sound a little pessimistic and crazy, especially during the holiday season. However, considering that the start of school was delayed-- twice-- on top of starting later than practically everyone else, you could imagine my itching to start. I was beyond thrilled to finally get the chance to learn my craft, to surround myself with other young creatives, to be under the expert tutelage of professionals in my field. And the past nine weeks have offered that and more.
With the help of a teacher, whose advice and guidance is now invaluable to me, I have pinpointed what exactly it is I want to accomplish. I have gained experience and exposure by being involved in a club that allows me to practice fashion journalism and build my contacts. I was also forced to spend some intimate time getting to know myself that I never thought was necessary before. I discovered skills I could improve upon and knowledge I have yet to discover.
During school, I was constantly busy with homework, events, and club activities all tailored to build my future. So when I arrived back in my hometown of eighteen years, the gnawing feeling of stasis sunk its teeth into me, like I had never left, like I was back at square one. I am a self-proclaimed creature of habit with an "always-on" attitude, so it is difficult to switch between constant hustling and being told to chill. Too bad there's no course on relaxation; it would definitely be full to bursting every semester.
So, the final plan for winter break is to relax and work at the same time. I will enjoy the freedom of an open schedule and write as much as possible about anything that piques my interest. I will develop my personal projects with my new knowledge and maybe, just maybe I'll sneak a nap in.
XOXO
Ka'Dia
